February 2003 Archives

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Random bits gathered from the last week or so...

Whatever happened to the word 'movie'? Have you realized that there's no such thing as a movie anymore? Everything that comes out now is a [deep voice] major motion picture event for some reason. Doesn't matter what the content of said event is - it could be "The Life & Times of Tennessee Tuxedo", but it's not a movie, it's a major motion picture event. Why can't it just be a motion picture? or even a major motion picture? or an event? or a major event? Nope, it's gotta be a major motion picture event. [here's a good play on those ads, by the way.]

My grandmother turns 90 on the 24th; I just saw her this weekend and she's still doing well. Her memory is going, but she has a great sense of humor about it. According to Hallmark, however, she and my grandfather don't exist. They make cards and balloons up until the 70th or 80th birthday, and up until the 50th wedding anniversary, but beyond that, I guess Hallmark doesn't see a profit in the "over 80 crowd". So instead, my cousin, who bought the balloons for the festivities, got huge nine and zero balloons. So of course, the first thing my grandmother does is put her little head through the hole in the middle of the zero. Still goofy after all these years.

Is there anything more annoying than stepping on a wet spot on the floor in your only pair of clean socks on laundry day?

Ok, since I've already had one link in this blog entry, I guess it's safe to make another one. I've never been the type of guy to seek out the latest and greatest in Flash animation cartoons, but for some reason this site cracks me up. You might remember me describing the comedian Brian Regan the same way - clean humor that's just hilarious. The most popular area is Strong Bad's emails but there's plenty of other ways to waste your time there too...

Sickness

For some reason I've always been fairly resistant to disease. I think I pick up this trait from my father, who I think I've only seen bedridden once or twice in my twenty-seven years (although my medical acumen wasn't all that keen back when I was three or four months old). This is definitely advantageous when you live in a school environment, because of the higher concentration of people in general and kids in particular, who aren't always the most germ-conscious of beings. Unfortunately, this resistance is not something that I share with my wife, who seems to have terrible luck when it comes to rampant viruses and bacteria going around campus. I've spent the last few days tending to her needs and generally being available for various household tasks.

There are only two times I can remember being ridiculously sick, other than having strep every year for what seems like every year of the 80's. For one of them, I honestly didn't think it was all that bad. It was a few months before I graduated college, and the girl I was spending a lot of time with had a nasty fever that left her a couple degrees short of spontaneous combustion. She eventually got so bad that we headed over to the medical center, and it turned out that she was running a fever of 102. The nurse saw me sitting in the waiting room and asked if I was sick too, which I had been for a couple of days. As a precaution she took my temperature, and it turns out that my temperature was around 105. But I was still lucid and not having any problems, despite a temperature that they said would normally send me to the emergency room, so they had me drink a quart of ice water and that dropped me all the way down to 104, at which point they sent me back to my dorm. Yeah college.

The other time was my run-in with the chicken pox, in fourth grade. I had the incredibly bad luck of getting it over Christmas vacation, so not only was I a scratching, lotioned mess, but I didn't even get to miss a day of school because of it. And to top it all off, I ended up giving it to my Australian cousins, who were visiting for the holidays, and they got to take it back to the southern hemisphere with them. All the citizens of Down Under were no doubt thankful that I saw fit to share with our foreign neighbors. I'm sure that when I go visit them, Australia will get its revenge on me...good thing I've got plenty of other places I want to visit first...